Not my Turkey Day

Thanksgiving.

I like the idea of gratitude for all that you've got and that people in your life, etc....
I even like idea of a harvest feast celebration, an opportunity to dine with loved ones.

What I don't like is the connection and insistence on Turkey. Ben Franklin wanted the Turkey to be the national bird rather than the bald eagle. We dodged a bullet on that one. But every year I wish that we could dodge the bullet of Turkey domination.

First of all, Turkey tastes gross. It tastes like Chicken marinated in mud. People tell me that it tastes just like chicken. I ask them if they can tell the difference. That is the part I don't like. I often tell people I'm allergic to the taste. That temporarily disarms them from telling me to grow up or get over it. After they figure it out they usually laugh. I then ask them what common food they don't like. And I can respond my telling them I love their dislikes such as: Pineapple pizza, bleu cheese, cilantro, root beer..... I can also use this for my other dislikes: Ham, bologna, miracle whip, teriyaki, cantaloupe, honeydew, blueberries, dr. pepper....

Second of all, there are many people who would be glad to eat something else. I've asked and many people say they would be glad to eat something else for Thanksgiving. I usually bring my own meat (often chicken). One year I brought a beef roast. Someone thought I was being absurd and the no one would want that. I saw it on almost every plate. Granted they had turkey too, but the door was open. Of course there are the folks who have a nostalgic reminiscence and attachment to Turkey. When I tried to lobby for a non Turkey Thanksgiving one year, I had a willing majority but and very upset and vocal minority demanding turkey.

Thirdly, why is there this bizarre American obsession with white meat? It is drier and has less flavor (I'm more connected to the Chicken side of this but it applies to turkey and duck too.) Domesticated turkey have been bred to have gigantic breasts vs. wild turkeys. It's like a Russ Meyer film a very year (and not in a good way). I've seen the cooking shows with the ways to keep the turkey from drying out and they mostly fall on deaf ears as people insist on doing things the way they've always seen them done. Dummies.


Oh, and fourthly, Tryptophan, stop bring it up. There is no truth it it being the reason that people are sleepy. It's the overeating, getting up early to cook and or family distress, and that means you, Dad.

I do like most of the other stuff though, so there is usually more than enough to eat. And yes I have nostalgic attachment to Pumpkin Pie. But I like pumpkin pie anytime I can get it, so there!